Friday, December 16, 2011

Lie: God Is Not Really Good

Nancy Leigh DeMoss starts her discussion in Lies Women Believe with lies we believe about God. This is a fantastic place to start. Really, what we think about God determines what we think about EVERYTHING. What we believe about His character and His power will determine how we react in situations, in relationships, in the day-to-day mundane of life. If we know who He truly is our hearts can not help but embrace Him and want to follow in His ways.

The best way to prevent lies from creeping into our hearts, is to flood our hearts with the truth. The best way to do this is to read the Word each day. Every word speaks truth about God- His character, His attributes, His track record in history. If our hearts are flooded with the truth, Satan's lies and half-truths won't stand a chance. We'll quickly disregard them as falsehoods and move on. However, if our hearts aren't saturated with the truth- we will give lies room to grow in our hearts.

As we look deeper into specific lies we believe about God, I want to encourage you to think about ways you are flooding your heart, your husband's heart, the hearts of your children, your family your friends, with truth. Ross and I have recently been very diligent in speaking truth to Caleb. "See that big tree, Caleb? God made that tree. He is much, much bigger than that tree. He made it and everything we can see and can't see." or "Do you see the rain, Caleb? God sends the rain to help the plants grow. He knows we need the rain. God sends it to us because He is good. God gives us everything we need." I encourage you to speak like this to your little ones. Flood their hearts with the truth!!

Okay, onto a specific lie that we often can believe, even in small parts in certain situations:
Lie- God is not really good. If He were, He would...

Satan doesn't try to convince us of this when things are peachy keen. It's when hard times come that he starts whispering in our ears, "A good God wouldn't let that girl die so young... A good God wouldn't allow your hardworking husband to lose his job... A good God wouldn't let your parents get divorced... A good God would provide you with a spouse. Why are you still single?" The variations of lies go on and on and on.

But the truth is simple: Paraphrased, Psalm 119:68 says,
"God is good and everything He does is good."

We can stand on that promise. Even when things are really ugly. And things will get really ugly (if they haven't already...) We also know from the Word that the world we live in is horribly corrupted by sin. At the creation it was good and everything in it was good, but our nature has changed and sin gives birth to evil things. We live in a world of hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, fires, starvation, exploitation, abuse. Bad stuff happens here. God sees it all. He allows it to happen. But that does not mean He is not good.

It does mean that "his thoughts are not our thoughts, neither are our ways His ways" Isaiah 55:8.

We must cling to the truth that God is good- ALL the time, in EVERY circumstance.

I love this quote DeMoss includes by Hannah Whitall Smith:

"A great many things in God's divine providences do not look to the eye like goodness. But faith sits down before mysteries such as these, and says, "The LORD is good, therefore all that He does must be good no matter how it looks. I can wait for His explanations."

Oh, the glorious day when He can explain to us how He was working good in all our circumstances!! Better yet, on that day, when we can see His face, I don't think we'll remember our circumstances very clearly...

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Lies Women Believe

I've been on a bit of a reading frenzy lately. The new book I have a hard time putting down and can't seem to stop pondering is Lies Women Believe (and the Truth that Sets Them Free) by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. If you attend Trinity, you can pick it up in the book stall for $10. If you don't, you can purchase or read more about it here.

The main premise of the book is that, from the beginning, Satan has been at work lying to God's people. Satan knows that the truth will really set us free to love God and to be all that He wants us to be. However, if he can get us to believe lies and half-truths, we can get caught up in sin and selfishness that leads to misery. The premise is simple, but the application is revolutionary.

The book is written primary to women, since Satan lied to us first and knows that we are especially susceptible to lies, but the book could benefit men as well. Satan lies to them, too- and it would be helpful for men to understand the kinds of mind games Satan plays on their wives.

Ms. DeMoss spends a chapter discussing how Satan lies and how devastating those lies can be, then she jumps into specific areas where Satan likes to lie the most- especially to Christian women. This is important to note, too. Satan lies to everyone, but he has specific tactics that he uses on women and even more specific tactics that he uses on women who belong to Jesus.

The specific areas that Ms. DeMoss covers are Lies About God, Lies About Ourselves, Lies About Sin, Lies About Priorities, Lies About Marriage, Lies About Children, Lies About Emotions and Lies About Circumstances.

My favorite part of the book is not the lies (hopefully!) but the specific truth taken from God's word that illuminates the lie and shows God's true will in that situation. Over the next couple of weeks, I'd like to share with you some lies that Nancy Leigh shares in her book, the truth that sets us free and how recognizing these lies has brought personal growth and change in my own heart.

I hope you join me in searching for, believing and applying the truth!

John 8:31-32

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

The Children of Abraham
31 To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. 32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”


Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Baby Watch

The past 2 days have been full of anticipation. I've been waiting for friends' babies to come.

The first was dear Natalie from Trinity. She was expecting her second child- another boy. His name is Joshua and has been for a long time. As soon as they found out it was a boy- they named him. I love that! Such a testament to life. We don't name "tissues" or "organisms". We name people. And Joshua has been a person this entire time. God's known him forever- his parents just got to meet him yesterday.

I went to bed on Sunday night knowing that Natalie was in the hospital, dilated to 6cm. I woke up in the middle of the night and thought of her. From then on I had some pretty scary labor dreams. I don't even want to tell you what they were. I kept waking up, assuring myself that it wasn't real and then falling asleep right in the middle of the dream again. It was awful.

You can imagine my joy and relief when I finally woke up and got a text saying Joshua was here and they both were safe and sound.

Then last night, I went to bed knowing that my sweet neighbor Beth was in the hospital. This is her 3rd child- also a boy. Jett is his name and he was a surprise-to them and to us. But not to God, of course :)

I don't know all the details of her delivery yet. She was supposed to be induced, but that kept being pushed back- like 5 days pushed back! Beth was admitted last night around 9pm, but just had the baby an hour or so ago. I had hoped to wake up with good news from her, too- but I had to wait longer for that.

All of this reminds me of how unpredictable babies are. Natalie was due on the 10th, but Joshua didn't come till the 13th. Beth's due date is this Friday, but she's been dilated to 3 for almost 2 weeks. We think we know when babies are coming, but we really don't. Even though Beth was going to be induced, she had very little control over that situation...

Yet, God did. Birth is one of those areas of life where we have to trust Him. We really have little control over when it will happen and how fast it will happen. There are so many details that we can not control. Praise God that He can, though!

I can't wait to sit down with each of these friends and listen to the details of their birth stories. What surprises were there? How did God show up?

And I can't wait to tell you my story in a few months. Until then, I'll keep praying that I have a heart that trusts and gladly hands over the control to Him. : )

Friday, December 9, 2011

Ten Reasons...

Today's been a little crazy. Caleb woke up an hour early, so we went down for a nap early. The LORD is the only one who knows when he'll get up... (An hour, 45 minutes, 3 hours??)

I had a long to-do list that included cleaning and all he wanted to do while he was awake was dump toys on the floor.

That's the kind of day I have had : )

So I'm going to go back to work, but I wanted to give you something to read.

Please check out this article entitled "Ten Great Reasons to Have Another Child."

If you're married and of child-bearing age, consider it : )

If you don't fit into those categories, rejoice that people are gifts from heaven- even the ones that dump toys all over the floor over and over again- most especially those ones : )

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Stupid BP!

I went to see the midwife today. I'm actually seeing a midwife practice and there's no guarantee who will be there when you deliver your baby, so you see them all. Today, I met with a precious lady named Lisa. She was wonderful, a great listener and encouraging to me. It was a great appointment actually, except for my blood pressure...

In case you don't know my BP history- here's a very quick rundown.
When I was about 6 months pregnant with Caleb, my bp was high. My ob didn't like that. The next time, I worried about it and it was still high. This went on and on until I was 39 weeks pregnant and my doctor said that high blood pressure could cause all kinds of problems and he induced me. It wasn't a horrible experience, but not what I had wanted for our birth and, really, not necessary.

2nd baby comes along and I don't want that same experience, so I change to Bethany Women's Center- an awesome midwifery/ob clinic. Everyone there is more naturally focused and super kind, but my bp has still been kind of high, just from fear of what happened last time.

Side note: I have a monitor that I use at home. On average, my bp is about 110/65- which is fantastic.

I've been praying about this situation for a long time now. When I was pregnant with Caleb, my prayers went like this: "Please, LORD, don't let my bp be high!" That was my prayer with my first couple appointments for this baby girl as well.

Then, a couple months ago, the LORD spoke to my heart. The root of my problem is not that my blood pressure is high. It's that I have an anxious heart. And that is not something out of my control. It feels like it is. I feel like I can't control my worries and my emotions and my fears. But that's a lie. I can. And I should.

My new prayer goes something like this: "Please, LORD, teach me to trust you in EVERYTHING. Remind me that you are ultimately in control. You are my shepherd. I don't need to fear. Use the truth in your word to cut out the anxious parts of my heart. "

My bp today was 152 (yikes!) over 68 (awesome!) Which means the LORD is working in me, but I'm still not done conquering this anxiety. The LORD is still not done teaching my heart to trust Him. And there are still fears that I cling to instead of clinging to him.

Can I ask for your prayers? That I would trust the LORD completely, with everything. That I would remember that He loves this little baby girl even more than I do. That His plan will prevail and bring Him glory.

Thanks, friends : )

Proverbs 3:5-6

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

How Many Kids?

The following has been on my mind a LOT lately. It's not politically correct. It's not a clear right or wrong/black or white answer. But I think the LORD has it on my heart for a reason...

"How many kids would you like to have?" It's such a common question- but most especially in this stage of life- with a little guy running around and a little girl on the way. My answer has been the same since Ross and I married. "Well, Ross wants 3, but I think I want 4." And people give the same sort of response "Oh, that's a lot of children, but you'd be a good mom. You could probably handle it."

I don't know how many times I've had a conversation like that. The amazing part is the emphasis on me in that equation. How many kids would YOU like to have? YOU could probably handle it.

Lately, I've been struck with the question- "How many kids would GOD like us to have?" He hasn't responded to me with a clear number. I don't think He ever will.

Think theologically with me for a moment. Set practicalities aside and just think about God.

1st- God is the one who gives life. I've seen this in my own life as we have "tried" to make babies. It's not my timing. It's His. It doesn't matter how hard Ross and I work at it- God's the one who decides whether or not to breathe life into the little ones.

2nd- God says that children are blessings. Throughout Scripture, God gives children to people in order to bless them. Proverbs 127:3 says that children are a heritage and a REWARD.

3rd- God is ultimately in control. He has a plan that I can not squelch- with my sin or my selfishness or with all of my grand plans. His will will be done.

So when I think this way I begin to wonder why I use birth control methods at all. Why would I want to prevent rewards and blessings? Why would I say no to life God wants to give me?

Then I start thinking practically-
1st- Kids cost money. A lot of money! How would we provide for lots of children?

2nd- Kids take time. Lots of time! How would I care for many, many children?

3rd- How many kids would I end up with anyway? 5, a dozen, 2 dozen???

4th- Big families complicate everything- what kind of vehicle would we have to own, could we ever go on vacation again, who's going to want to buy my kids Christmas presents, how do we put a bunch of kids through college, what would our house have to look like, etc. etc. etc.

5th- What if God blessed us with 6 kids right away (big #, but not unreasonable) then, when I'm 45- He gives us another one! Then what??

But then I start applying what I know about God to those practical issues:
Yes, kids cost money and time- but God says He will provide for all of our needs and that we ought not to worry about clothes, food, etc.

Scripture is full of big families. Some happy, some not- but the size doesn't seem to affect their happiness. Their devotion to God and His ways, does though.

Scripture is also full of old ladies having babies. Really old ladies, not 45-year-olds. While age is a very important factor in motherhood according to our culture, it seems trivial to God.

So what does this all mean to me?
I don't know. It's easy to talk about trusting the LORD and forsaking birth control when you're 5 months pregnant and know just 1 is on the way. It may be a totally different matter, however, months after our little girl is born.

Ross thinks I'm a little crazy. I totally get that. Culture- even our Christian culture!!- has programmed us to think that 2 kids are necessary and every one after that is a step closer and closer to insanity. I obviously need to respect and honor my husband and his wishes, but we also both need to be on the same page as God.

And I don't think God thinks big families are weird at all. In fact, He's probably thankful that at least some people are willing to accept His rewards. : )

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Changing Seasons

Life is good right now for us Phoenicians. The end of summer is in sight! Finally, the thermometer is not reading over 100- in fact, mine says 66 right now. Time to put away the shorts and tees, and unpack the jeans and sweaters. I love this time of year and an welcoming it with open arms.

But I have a secret to admit. Come late March, I'll be craving sunshine. I won't want to wear jeans one more minute. At the first sign of warmth, I'll be happily unpacking the jeans and summer dresses.

So which one is it? Do I like cool air or warm? Do I prefer fall or spring? The correct answer is both.

I think it is so kind of God to have created the different seasons. How every few months things change around here. Always something new to prepare for- always something new to look forward to.

Each season has it's glory- spring's flowers, summer's abundant sunshine, fall's crisp air, winter's still beauty. And each season has it's downfall- spring's allergies, summer's scorching heat, fall's wetness, winter's looong, dark nights. Yet we don't get to enjoy or endure any season for very long.

In God's grace, He brings something new and something different every so often. He does that in life, too. Just when we start getting used to a season (and often, bored with it) something new comes along. He mixes things up.

Here's a small example from my life: Caleb and I were getting super comfortable with his 2-nap stage. I had my whole day figured out around his 10-12 and 3-4 naps. We didn't go many places, but boy, did I get a lot of work done around here! Just as I felt like I had it all figured out, Caleb has dropped his first nap. A new season is here!

Come spring, our family will be entering an entirely new season with the addition of a little baby. Things will be different. Some things will be uncomfortable (like winter's long nights and summer's scorching heat). However, many things will be glorious.

So what season are you in today? Have you just entered it? Enjoy the newness! Are you getting ready to transition? Thank God that He is with you to sort through the changes. And always, always, be looking for the good aspects of the season you are in : )

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

Ecclesiastes 3

A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Pregnancy Praises

Once upon a time, I thought getting pregnant was super simple and easy to do. Ha!

Then we tried having Caleb. After a couple months of trying, my heart was discouraged and my husband saddened for me. It was right around Christmastime and I decided that I was going to put a paragraph in our Christmas letter about the situation. Letting people know that we wanted to start having children and that we would appreciate their prayers on our behalf.

It was a humbling thing to do. Once 50 families know you're trying, you can be sure to hear "Are you pregnant yet?" 50 more times.

But I felt it was a wise choice. The letters went out the 2nd week in December. We found out we were pregnant the 2nd week in January.

You can call that coincidence if you want. I'm sure the fact that Ross had 2 weeks off of work and that they were relaxing days certainly helped. But I think it is evident that the LORD listened to the many prayers of our dear friends and families and He blessed us with baby Caleb.

Fast forward 17 months. We think we want a 2nd baby. We try for a while and things don't seem to be working again. I post something here on the blog, asking for prayer and I ask for prayer in our small group as well.

A month later, we find out we're pregnant.

Isn't God good? If you are one of the many people that have prayed for our family, I hope you feel encouraged. I hope your heart rejoices that the LORD has heard you and your intercession for our family. I hope you feel a little more connected to us and to this little baby growing inside me. The LORD listened and breathed life inside me.

Infertility- of all kinds- is prevalent and heartbreaking. The Bible is full of stories of women who can't bear children and their extreme sadness. It is also full of stories of women who pour out that desire to God and He blesses them. If you want children, I encourage you to trust in His plan and to ask people to pray for you. I know that He listens.

Side Story: My grandma lives next to a very sweet Christian couple. When they first moved in, they had one son who was 8 years old. The mother shared that she wanted more children, but they hadn't been able to conceive. My grandma asked if she could pray for this woman. She eagerly agreed. Not too long after, the lady had a baby girl, then another one, and another one! They now have a family of 4. The woman politely asked my grandma to stop praying for them : )

God is good. All the time. He knows our hearts' desires. He has a plan for us. He rejoices when He can bless us with good things.

Samuel 1:26-28

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

26 and she said to him, “As surely as you live, my lord, I am the woman who stood here beside you praying to the LORD. 27 I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. 28 So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD.” And he worshiped the LORD there.


Our stats:

I am due March 26th. I am 13 1/2 weeks pregnant at this point. We do hope to find out if it is another boy or a baby girl. We should know in mid-November. I will keep you updated : )


Monday, September 19, 2011

I NEED Him!

My brain has been in overwhelm mode again. Perhaps it has to do with Caleb's birthday party or an influx of pregnancy hormones (and, therefore, worries) or simply that life can be overwhelming.

I explained it to Ross this way: My brain is like a computer. I start thinking about something and that's like when you open a program on the computer. Something else happens, and I have to stop working on one program to work on another. An afternoon goes by and I have 15 programs open and NONE of them are working efficiently because they ALL require full brain capacity.

When this happens, I often end up crying because choosing what we'll eat for the next week is too hard. Something minor like that becomes impossible and I become discouraged.

That's where my brain, and heart, were this morning. Overwhelmed, confused, chaotic disarray. Ross called to check on me at 9am this morning. I told him I had a plan to fix the troubles.

When Caleb laid down for his morning nap, I walked past the sink full of dirty dishes, past the piles of wrapping paper and tissue, past the 50 half-floating helium balloons. I walked straight in our bedroom and found a peaceful spot- on the floor, between the bed and the closet, facing our dresser. Nothing distracting to look at. Nothing to pull from my focus.

I started journalling. I ended up writing 5 pages of just all that was on my heart and mind. I prayed. Asked God to show me the solutions to these many problems. Asked Him for guidance in many relationships. Asked Him to meet me in my weakness. I searched for answers in the Word.

I ended up face flat on the floor, telling the LORD that I need Him- for EVERYTHING.

I think we can easily tell ourselves that we need God for a few things- for salvation, for comfort when people pass on, for direction for MAJOR life decisions, you know. We need God for BIG DEALS.

But the truth is, I need Him for EVERYTHING. I need Him to breathe. I need Him to wash the dishes. I need Him as I choose our meals for the week. I need him to help me reconcile some relationships. I need Him for EVERYTHING.

What peace that realization brought! I don't have to do any of this on my own. The little things, the big things, everything in the middle. He's here and He wants me to be completely dependent on Him.

I got up off the floor, walked out of my bedroom and faced those dirty dishes, piles of paper and balloons. My situation hadn't changed one bit, but my attitude did.

What relief to know we don't have to do any of this on our own! (Insert MASSIVE sigh here :) )

Psalm 40:16-17

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


16 But may all who seek you
rejoice and be glad in you;
may those who love your salvation always say,
“The LORD be exalted!”

17 Yet I am poor and needy;
may the Lord think of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
O my God, do not delay.


Sunday, September 18, 2011

Caleb's Birth Story

Caleb’s birth story is different from most, since I was induced. Ross and I had hoped for a natural delivery, so the inducement was a disappointment. However, God is eternally faithful, especially in making disappointing situations into glorious ones. : ) This story is, most definitely, a picture of his faithfulness and protection.

At my 39 week appointment, my ob/gyn took his hands into mine and told me that he thought it was best that I not carry Caleb any longer than my due date. At the past several office visits, my blood pressure had been elevated. Although I showed no other sign of complication, he was adamant that I be induced. If Caleb did not come on his own in the next 4 days, my labor would be induced on Saturday, September 18th.

After that appointment, I got into my car, called Ross and cried. Ross assured me that things would be okay and that God would take care of us.

One positive to being induce is actually knowing when your baby is going to come : ) With that knowledge, I asked Ross if he would take 2 days off of work to be with me at home, preparing for the baby’s arrival and doing whatever we could to induce labor ourselves : ) Those two days were precious times of closeness and eagerness.

Friday evening came. I had been instructed to call the hospital at 9pm. If they had room for me, I would go in at 10pm and begin induction. I called and there was no room in the inn! The nurse told me they would call me when there was room available. I asked when she thought that would be, she politely said she didn’t know, but encouraged me to get some rest. Ha! That’s not so easy to do when you know your baby will be here soon…

Ross and I gathered all of our things and got in bed. I asked that he pray with me. We spent half an hour praying back and forth- that the doctor and nurses would have wisdom, that they would be kind and gracious, that the LORD would protect Caleb and me, that He would be glorified throughout the entire process. This, too, was a very precious time. It helped center our hearts around Christ, bound our hearts together, and a day later, we were able to thank God for answering each of those prayers.

I finally fell asleep around midnight and was awoken by a phone call at 4am. A kind nurse named Emily asked that we get ourselves ready and come to the hospital. Ross packed the car and I ate a humble breakfast of dry toast and jello (very odd, but you’re not really hungry at 4am and the instructions said to eat light…) We took a couple pictures of Caleb on the inside, then got in the car and pulled away from the house.

I had spent some time worrying about me needing to call Ross home from work while I was in labor. That his 45 minutes commute would be too long. That our drive to the hospital in rush hour traffic would be extremely painful and too long. None of those worries were necessary. Our drive was quick, quiet and peaceful.

We arrived at Banner Thunderbird right around 5 am and spent the next hour filling out paperwork and getting settled in our labor and delivery room. I was able to meet the nurse who had called us on the phone, Emily. She politely asked me if I taught school at Orangewood Elementary. I told her I had for the past two years. She then told me that she was the aunt of one of my former students. What a sweet blessing!

Upstairs, I was assigned a very kind nurse who was very excited when I said I wanted a natural delivery. She hurried around and found me a birthing ball and a rocking chair to use. She asked me what my progress had been at my last doctor’s visit. I told her 1 cm and a “soft” cervix. She didn’t seem to like that answer. She checked me herself and said I was “2ish and yes, it was quite soft.”

I had been told that my induction would start with progesterone gels and that I would be able to walk around the hospital to get labor started. However, my doctor changed his mind and I was given half of a Cytotec pill to take. I vocalized my disappointment in not being able to walk, but not being one to argue, I took the pill. I really wish I hadn’t. While Caleb and I turned out just fine, the pill has never been FDA approved for induction and can have some serious side effects when used for that purpose.

I took the pill at 6am and that, unfortunately, marked the end of our time with our first dear, sweet nurse. I was nervous to let her go. She assured me that everything would be just fine.

Our new nurse was pleasant and sweet, but not nearly as excited about my decisions to avoid pain medication. However, she was helpful and several hours later, I wanted her help more than my doctor's : )

Because Cytotec is dangerous, your baby has to be monitored continually. This meant that I had two belts wrapped around my tummy the entire time. One measured Caleb’s heart beat, the other measured my contractions. I was only allowed to take them off to go to the bathroom. If I was careful, I could sit on the birthing ball and hold them on or stand very close to my bed and they could still work properly. Once, they slid off on to the floor and my nurse came running in, afraid that Caleb’s heart had stopped beating. Silly girl, it was just that the floor didn’t have a heartbeat!

By 9 am, not much had happened at all, very weak contractions and no cervical progress. My doctor then broke my bag of waters. This caused a whole lot of mess everywhere I stood, and some slightly heavier contractions, but not much else. I then took the other half of the Cytotec.

By 11 am, I was having contractions every 2 minutes, but they were very weak. I could talk to Ross through them very easily.

Noon comes around and the nurse comes in very chipper to say that I will now to be put on a Pitocin drip. I nod my head, the Cytotec and water breaking are not working, this is the next logical doctor step. When she left the room I broke down into violent tears. This was not at all what I had dreamed it would be.

By 1pm, I was now attached to the monitor by my belly and attached to a pole by my left arm. The Pitocin got things really moving and since my contractions were already 2 minutes apart, things moved very quickly. I now needed to use everything I had learned in our Bradley classes during contractions. Ross was a great coach, helping me relax through each of them. At around 4pm, I had progressed to 5 cm.

And that’s when transition started. In an hour, I would progress the rest of the way. I don’t remember much from that hour at all, except that my legs felt they were being crushed underneath a car and that Ross was having to be very loud and intentional with me. I wanted to flounder about during contractions instead of lying still and he was having to give directions over and over again before I would listen. It was also during this time that some nurses and aides came into our room looking for supplies that they needed. This angered me greatly and I told Ross to keep the people away…

At 5pm, the nurse checked me again and announced that I was fully dilated. All of the sudden, there were LOTS of people in our room, our nurse ripped off the end of the bed, tons of lights were turned on and lots of emergency equipment was brought in the room. Still very out of it, I asked what was going on. Some random aide announced, “We’re having a baby!” I remember this made me smile.

And just as quickly as I had become illogical and lost, I became excited and clear-thinking. I suddenly had several minutes between contractions and spent that peaceful time talking to Ross about the baby being here soon. Pushing, even without pain meds, was by far my favorite part. The contraction didn’t hurt when I pushed. At last, I am doing something to help Caleb along! My nurse was very helpful at this time, but nervous, because my doctor was delivering a baby next door. I told her I wanted her to catch my baby. We didn’t need his help.

He did arrive in time, however, and was present for my last few pushes. When Caleb’s top half was out, he asked me to put my hands down between my legs. I put them down, but outside my legs. He gave me the direction again. I followed it correctly this time and was then able to pull Caleb the rest of the way out and onto my chest.

The doctor then asked Ross where the camera was. Amazed at what just happened, he floundered about looking for the camera. Ross then cut the cord (which he wasn’t sure he was going to be able to handle before that moment. Turns out, it was easy : ) ). And I held Caleb close for a long time.

He was born at 5:40 pm. The entire induction took less than 12 hours and my “hard labor” only lasted 4 hours, with 40 minutes of pushing.

Looking back, we know God was present protecting us. Protecting Caleb and me from any number of things that can go wrong with Cytotec and Pitocin. I am so thankful that I am able to deliver him naturally and do believe that although it was extremely painful there for a while, that it helped us avoid all kinds of scary interventions.

Next time, we are going to go a more natural route. I have heard wonderful things about the nurse-midwives at Bethany Women’s Center. Their approach to pregnancy is much more relaxed and natural. They avoid induction the best they can and use more natural methods when they do induce. We will deliver at Phoenix Baptist Hospital, just a few miles south of our home. We are excited for a more natural experience.

We are especially excited because we have already started that new adventure. We discovered we were pregnant in late July. We will deliver our baby in late March. We’ve seen 2 nurse midwives and LOVE the care that they provide. Much more natural, much more relaxed. Much less invasive.

God is good. So good. I can’t wait to tell you how He is faithful during this next pregnancy and birth story!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Didn't Plan on Needing Pedialite Today

I had a doctor's appointment early this morning, so my grandma came over to watch Caleb. I left with him still asleep and Great Grandma waiting for him to wake on the couch.

I walk back in the house an hour later. It's totally silent in the house, his bottle is still on the counter, Great Grandma still on the couch waiting. He's still asleep. At 8:30. This NEVER happens.

I go in to his room and start whispering his name, his little head pops up. I happily grab him and take him out to the kitchen. We say goodbye to Great Grandma and then we sit down on the couch to drink his milk.

"Why were you so sleepy?" I ask. Caleb stares back at me as he guzzles his bottle. Well... most of it. He normally drinks 4 oz in the morning, but I can't get him to drink any more than 3. "Aren't you hungry?" I ask. This is normally the part of the morning when he sits down for a nice breakfast of toast and banana.

I set him down in his high chair and "bluh---" here comes all the milk he just drank. Caleb smiles up at me, like nothing's wrong. I get him cleaned up and hand him a few pieces of toast. He nibbles happily. I snack on some bagel and cream cheese. Surely, everything is fine.

After I take him out of the high chair, he immediately squats down next to it. Time to change the diaper. We get him cleaned up and I leave him on the floor of his bedroom so I can go wash my hands. I don't hear the "bluh---" this time (even though I'm sure it happened) but I do hear the crying afterwards. I rush into his room and there he sits, in a big pile of toast puke.

Poor baby! I quickly pick him up and throw the blanket he just puked on in the laundry. (Wasn't that a blessing! He didn't puke on the carpet, but on an easily-cleaned blanket!) Then we make a phone call I've made WAY too many times in the past year- the call to Nurse Triage at the pediatrician's office.

It takes a while for them to get back to me. Caleb seems happy, and doesn't look like he's going to throw up any more. The only thing we had on the calendar for today was to shop at the party store for his first birthday party. I decide that he's healthy enough to do that.

(Silly me! Nothing bad happened while we were gone, but really! What would I have done if my mother suggested going shopping for my birthday party after I had just puked twice?? Probably fought tooth and nail. What does Caleb do? Smile like he knows that Sunday will be the best day of his little life and that yes, mother, he would LOVE to shop for it.)

As we drive to Party City, I wonder if he has a fever. How could I have not checked that? Why are we in the car anyway? We walk into the party store and are greeted by a life-size replica of Freddy Kreuger. It talks and moves, too. I wonder if EVERY year we shop for Caleb's birthday, will we have to put up with Halloween junk...

We finish our shopping in a record 10 minutes and get back in the car. When we get home, Caleb seems ready for his nap, even though he's only been awake for 2 hours. I lay him down and he falls asleep so quickly. Poor sick, baby.

I sit down to do my quiet time and I am interrupted by the doctor's office. The nurse gives me a Pedialite regimen to follow. 1 teaspoon every 5 minutes for an hour. 2 teaspoons every 10 minutes for another hour. 2 oz every 20 minutes for an hour after that. I hang up the phone, already exhausted. Caleb's still sleeping. We don't have any Pedialite.

So when he wakes up, I smile at him and thrust him back in the car. He's sweet and happy-hearted the entire time.

We return from the grocery with the Pedialite and I begin giving him droppers of "special juice" every 5 minutes. And, somehow, this is kind of fun. Caleb lays on my lap, while I squeeze the dropper. He giggles when I tickle his tummy. He plays with the dropper. We get to do this every 5 minutes.

For the next 3 hours, he and I just have fun. Every 5, 10, 20 minutes, I pick him up, snuggle him and give him a bit of special juice.

This is NOT what I had planned for today. This IS what God had planned. What a gift! Of all the kinds of sickness to hit, thanks God, that it was easy enough to clean up. Thanks that snuggling is part of the cure. Thanks that we didn't have to cancel a lot of plans in order to do this.

Thanks, God, that you gently snuggle us and give us everything we need every 5, 10, 20 seconds...

Proverbs 19:21

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

21 Many are the plans in a man’s heart,
but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Open-Armed

In case you haven't noticed, I've been jumping around a little bit in Proverbs 31. It's not that the verses I have skipped aren't important. I am going to clump a few of them together and write several posts about working outside the home. That's a major topic- and one of utmost importance. So as I carefully work on those ones, I'm sharing the more straightforward verses here. Today's verse is very, very straightforward:

Proverbs 31:20

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.


The wife of noble character is not just concerned for the needs of her household- but for the needs of people around her as well. Notice how she doesn't just toss some money out her window. She "opens her arms" and "extends her hands" to the poor and needy. She welcomes them... she loves them.

What poor and needy people do you come in contact with everyday? Where we live, it's not uncommon to see needy people every day, every where we go. I have to admit that as a woman, I'm nervous and often not open-armed towards people that approach me for money while I'm trying to load Caleb and a bunch of groceries into the car. I often ponder what Christ would have me do in those situations-- and I don't have the answer yet.

But I DO know that we are to care for the poor and needy and that we should teach our children to do the same.

So what are some practical ways that we can have open arms? If you have children in school, you can be on the look out for families in need. Perhaps there's a student who doesn't have a backpack or one that seems hungry often. Talk to your child's teacher about ways you can help. Take your older children to volunteer at the local food bank or soup kitchen.

Trinity offers the Mobile Pantry through St. Mary's Food Bank the 1st Saturday of each month. You could volunteer there or bring a neighbor along who could use the extra help.

While the words "poor" and "needy" most likely deal directly with material needs, don't stop there. All of us know people who are poor and needy in terms of love, acceptance and an understanding of the gospel.

Let's be aware of people around us in need and pray that the Lord would give us wisdom and resources to meet those needs.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Vacuums and Stretch Marks

Proverbs 31:17

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.


There are some household chores that I have a hard time making it through. Vacuuming is one of them. It seems so daunting. It takes at least twenty minutes to vacuum our (small) house sufficiently. It's so noisy. I always get hot and sweaty doing it. And we have cheap, old-roommate-stained carpet. You can't see where you've been and where you haven't. Basically, I push this noisy thing around for 20 minutes, look like I've run a marathon all for NO visible results.

As you can tell- vacuuming is not enjoyable for me- so for several years I would make it a seasonable occasion. Literally, the carpet would be vacuumed no more than 6 times a year.

And then our little bundle of joy started going mobile and started eating anything he could find. And there were certainly things to be found (mostly stuff he'd thrown off the high chair tray just hours before.)

My dear husband asked that I take vacuuming more seriously. I asked our dear Father to give me a sacrificial love for our baby- a heart that would put up with vacuuming.

And He did! I'm happy to announce that I've vacuumed once a week for the past month or so and that I've experienced JOY for the 20 minutes I've done it. Praise God!

Some of you are probably laughing. Okay, maybe all of you are, but this is worth getting excited about. In Proverbs, we read that we should go about our work vigorously, where everything inside us says "Sit on the couch. Don't worry about it...." And we have to fight those urges. We have to fight our own selfishness and laziness and get busy with our work. I pray that the LORD instills within you an ability to be vigorous in whatever work you need to do today and tomorrow and the day after that....

And just a quick word about her strong arms. : )

I distinctly remember being a young girl sitting at my grandmother's kitchen counter. Grandma was upset about something- someone actually. I can't remember if this someone was a person we really knew or a famous person, but Grandma was upset because this person had "never worked a day in her life." How did my Grandma know this? "Her hands. Those hands are too perfect to have ever rung out a baby's diaper." My Grandma could look at this woman's hands and know whether or not she has suffered and worked for her family.

Are your arms strong for your tasks? Are your hands dry from washing 3 sinkfuls of dishes a day? Are you arms scratched from trimming bushes and trees in your backyard? Is your middle marked by skin stretching back and forth as children grew inside you?

Don't be ashamed of these signs- signs of hard work and sacrifice. I guarantee you God finds them beautiful.

Monday, August 29, 2011

A Small Part of God's Good Work

The LORD is so good. He is so faithful. He does amazing things and He asks that we be a part of them! I am in awe of that right now.

Friday night, we had our Slumber Party retreat. I was sick the week beforehand. It became very real in the days leading up to the retreat that if good things were going to happen, it was because God was going to do them. It was His time to be with His people. He had asked for my hands and feet, but He was going to do the good work.

This was a humbling realization for me, yet so comforting as well. It doesn't take me too long to figure out that I am frail and weak and selfish and incapable of lots of things. He has given me gifts. True. However, if they are being used for my selfish gain instead of His glory, they are fully wasted.

I went to church on Friday hoping that the activities that I had planned really were what God wanted His women to participate in- that they really were from Him. And the cool part? They were. Women's hearts were open to the gospel and to His word. They were able to reflect on what God has done for us in Jesus and then moved to respond like He would.

That's such an awesome feeling. To know that the work you've been participating in the past few months really has been God's work. To see how He uses our simple hands to transform hearts.

I am blessed!

If you helped in any way, I want to encourage you as well. God used your feeble hands for His kingdom building. If you came to the retreat, know that the work God did in you is an encouragement to our hearts as well.

May we never forget that He's the one working and moving and changing lives. May we never cease to want to be a part of His good work!

Ephesians 2:10

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

10 For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.



Monday, August 22, 2011

Icky Sicky!

A couple weeks ago, poor little Caleb got a runny nose. That little runny nose got worse and worse and more and more colorful, until it was a green, sticky mess. We went to the doctor last week and it was diagnosed as a sinus infection and we were given antibiotics.

He takes the medicine really well and his nose was clearing up. Then, Saturday night, Ross was changing his diaper and called me back to Caleb's bedroom. There was Caleb's little bottom- flaming red. Great- yeast!

Poor little guy is recovering- he doesn't seem to mind anti-fungal being rubbed on his bottom or being rinsed after every diaper change in the bathroom sink. He's a trouper.

I, on the other hand, seem to have developed a sinus infection, too. Wow- it's so much harder to be sick while caring for a little one! Today, I basically removed anything Caleb isn't allowed to touch (the fan, the garbage can), closed all the bedroom and bathroom doors, and let him roam around while I lied helpless on the couch.

It's hard to not feel lazy on days like this. Really, this whole weekend. I've felt miserable- so I lie on the couch and just stare at all the stuff that needs to be done around here- the dishes are piling up, the carpet really needs to be vacuumed, the counter has had junk mail on it for a week!
Then I remember that sometimes God calls us to rest. It may not seem to be an opportune time for us (we have that slumber party on Friday, remember?) But it is ideal for Him. He simply says, "Stop striving. Rest for a little while and rely on Me. "

So that's what we're up to for the next couple of days. Forget the dishes, the vacuum, the little extras. And rest!

Psalm 23:1-2

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

Psalm 23

Psalm 23
A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

Monday, August 15, 2011

Slumber Party Retreat!

I haven't posted in almost a week. I haven't been doing what I said I would. I'm sorry.

In less than 2 weeks, Trinity's Women's Ministry will be hosting our 3rd Annual Slumber Party Retreat. This is a very sweet, special time for women to gather and fellowship and worship together. It's my favorite event all year and it takes a LOT of work.

So that's what I've been doing instead of blogging- working on the retreat. I hope you understand : )

I would LOVE to have you join us for the retreat this year. It will be from Fri Aug 26th-Sat Aug 27th. The program Friday evening runs from 7pm-10pm. Saturday morning is from 9am-11am. You can stay overnight if you want, but you don't have to : ) Everything happens in the Education Building at church. This provides flexibility for women who want to go home and keeps costs really low. It only costs $10 and that includes a yummy hot breakfast in the morning.

Our theme this year is "The Greatest Story". We will be looking at the gospel and how it should affect every day of our lives. There will be lots of time to meditate on the Word and to fellowship with other women.

I hope you will join us. If you Facebook, you can RSVP here.
If not, you can e-mail me at dru-lynng@tbcphoenix.org to RSVP or if you have further questions.

Thanks for reading and for waiting for the next post from Proverbs 31 : )

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Where are my Servant Girls?

Proverbs 31:15

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.


I can't help but smile as I read this verse. It instantly takes me back to a conversation I had several years ago with my grandma.

I don't know how the conversation got here, but she was talking about reading this verse and asking God, "Hey! No wonder this woman can do all this stuff. She has servant girls. Why, Lord? Why can't I have servant girls?"

It's a legitimate question. When we read this verse, it's easy to skip past the part about getting up early and jump right to the unfair portion. Where are my servant girls?

My grandma felt like the Lord spoke to her that day. Very directly. As she was complaining about not having servant girls- he gently reminded her of her dishwasher, the washing machine, the dryer, the vacuum cleaner. These aren't servant girls, but they do certainly make the job easier. Personally, I may exchange my dishwasher for a helper's conversation and sweet company, though : )

Okay... okay... enough dreaming about hired help around here. What is this verse really trying to teach us?

This woman works hard and is productive. I don't get up before the sun rises, but I can tell you that most of my hard work gets done while my boys are busy. This past weekend, I had dishes to make for potluck parties and I purposely got up before they did to cook. It was so.... peaceful. I didn't have to feel bad kicking Caleb out of the kitchen. I didn't have to feel bad watching Ross chase Caleb around. I could just enjoy the peaceful morning cooking and caring for my family.

How do you feel about your daily tasks now? Are they harried and hectic? Are you constantly being torn between household tasks and the screams of your children? Do you have trouble concentrating on one task? Perhaps it would best be done in a peaceful home. Maybe that means rising earlier than your family. Maybe it means working during naps instead of reading or checking Facebook (personal conviction- here!) Maybe it means working at home while the children are at school, instead of busying ourselves with lots of appointments.

This woman is also generous. My NIV study bible doesn't make any specific notes here about this verse, but I am assuming that it was especially kind of her to set aside portions of food for her servant girls. Now, we aren't going to set aside portions of food for our dishwasher and vacuum cleaner... but we can be kind and generous to others who help us.

My mom sets a great example of being generous to others. She has several medical issues and sees many doctors and visits the pharmacy often. She could be discouraged about her situation, but instead, she blesses doctors, nurses and pharmacists with plates of cookies and other treats. Who can you provide portions for? The mailman. Your child's teacher. Your neighbors.

This verse demonstrates again how we can be loving and faithful- by working hard and being generous.


Thursday, August 4, 2011

Feeding the Family

Proverbs 31:14

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.


Mmmmm...... Food! Have you ever stopped to think about what a gift food is? God could have made us so we never needed to stop and fuel our bodies. But we do need to. Several times a day in fact. Well then, he could have made food a very mundane thing- same old, same old. But He didn't. Food can smell delightful and taste delightful and look delightful and food is a GREAT way to bless your family.

Have you ever thought about it that way? I know sometimes it's easy to get bogged down with the inconveniences of food. You have to decide what your family will eat. You have to plan which day you are going to eat it. You have to make a grocery list. You have to go fetch the food. And in that process, you have to fight off cravings and urges and marketing traps to make healthy, affordable choices. And you still haven't cooked anything yet! The task can seem unbearable.

Although, cumbersome, let's try to think about providing food for our family as a joy. The past paragraph might lead you to believe that cooking overwhelms me. Sometimes it does, but mostly I love it. It's by far my favorite chore- because at the end of it, you get to eat : )

Whether you love cooking or hate it, whether you work full time outside the home or in, there are a few things we want to remember as we provide food for our families.

- Make it a blessing, not a chore. How can you incorporate your husband's favorite meal into this week's plan? What can you do to surprise your child when they open up their lunchbox? Who can your family reach out to this weekend by inviting over to dinner?

- Healthfulness promotes holiness. I don't think serving your children donuts for breakfast, or McDonald's for lunch, or popcorn for dinner is a sin. (Maybe if it was all in one day...) We don't want to be legalistic, but we do want to be healthy. Because, the truth is- when we're healthy we have energy for things God wants us to do. Our husbands need to be healthy so that they can provide for our families and lead us well. Our kids need to be healthy so that they can play and learn about God's world. We need to be healthy so that we can serve our families well. God gave us bodies to house our spirits and His. We need to take care of them so that we can do His work well.

- Recruit little hands. Believe it or not, someday your 2 year old little girl or 10 month old little guy is going to be living on their own and will need to eat 3 times a day. Now is the time to be teaching them, little by little, how to thank God for their food, how to eat healthy, how to bless others with something their little hands have made. Teach your children- boys and girls- how to use food to bring God glory.

I'd like you to think about that as you prepare dinner tonight- be in from scratch, or a box or a drive-thru- that feeding your family is a task that you can use to bring God glory. Now, how cool is that?


Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Eager Hands

Proverbs 31:13

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.

Are you worried about the words "wool and flax"? Don't be. Make sure you read my last post before you move on : )

This woman cares for her husband and her children by weaving wool and flax into fabric and then making that fabric into clothes for them. You probably don't do that... And that is okay : )

What matters is that your husband and children are clothed. You may make clothes for them. You may purchase good quality clothes for them at high end stores. You may purchase gently used clothes at consignment or thrift stores. You may gladly share hand-me-down clothes with neighbors. What your children wear doesn't really matter. What matters is that they have clothes that you have thoughtfully acquired and that they are taken care of (which means the laundry has to be done : ) )

Also of super importance is how she goes about her tasks at home. What kind of hands does she work with? EAGER hands.

Are your hands eager? Are you excited to care for your family and your home with your hands? I'm definitely not always eager to work- but we should be. Caring for our families- sacrificing our desires for their needs- is a visual picture of the gospel. We should work eagerly with our hands.

Look around you. What needs to be done around your house? Ask God to give you eager hands to do it! : )

(At my house, I need to eagerly scrub both of our shower/bathtubs. I need to ask the LORD to give me eager hands for that one!)

From Hearts to Hands

I hope you have been encouraged so far as we walk through Proverbs 31. It's not so much the things that we do as our hearts that matter. Our noble character, our husband's full confidence in us, and our desire to bring our husbands good are much more meaningful than a clean house and a gourmet meal.

However, a wife who demonstrates noble character, has her husband's confidence, and wants to bring him good ALL the days of her life, will show these things in very practical ways.

We are about to jump into those verses head on. Before we begin, I want to encourage you to continue looking at this woman's heart. Many of the verses will comment on both a practical action and an attitude of the heart. Keep both in mind.

Also, don't become discouraged if it talks about some skill that you don't do well. The Proverbs 31 woman is an incredible seamstress. You may not be. I certainly am not. I took 2 courses in high school. I passed them both, but I'm not sure how. I don't have the precision or dexterity to sew well. The fact that I don't sew my family's clothes isn't the issue. They are clothed. And that is important. : )

I invite you to join me as we continue along in Proverbs 31- looking at how our hearts will cultivate practical actions to build a happy home.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Bring Good!

Proverbs 31:12

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.


I love this verse. It may be my favorite one in this whole passage.

As we think about what it means to be a sweet wife and a happy homemaker, this verse says it all. Our goal should be to bring our husbands good, not harm ALL the days of our lives.

What does "good" look like? Every husband is different, so every one will define "good" differently. So go ahead and ask him!

If he's anything like Ross, good things will look like: having a happy heart, giving hugs and kisses freely, using lots and lots of encouraging words, being confident of his abilities and his love for me. Then there's the practical things, making his lunch for the next day, planning dinners for the week, arranging babysitters so we can enjoy a date night here and there. Sex might be on the "good" list too : )

I encourage you to ask your husband what kinds of things would do him good and eagerly, happily do them!

We also need to be aware and watchful for harmful things as well. Most of us would say that we would never want to purposely bring our husbands harm, but we all can be selfish and forsake his needs for ours and sometimes that means harm.

Here are some common "harm-ers": being too busy with the practical things for an encouraging word or a kiss, spitting out a bunch of frustrations from your day with no time to listen about theirs, nagging (uh! It's the worst! Your husband didn't marry you because he needed another mother. Stop nagging and start praying!) planning a super busy family schedule with little time for your husband to rest and relax alone or with friends.

These are just a few. Again, I encourage you, ask your husband what kinds of things bring him good- seek to do them happily- and those that bring him harm- and avoid them like the plague : )

Friday, July 29, 2011

Full Confidence

Proverbs 31:11

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)


11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.


Ross is a mechanical engineer-which is very much a male-dominated field. Most of the people he interacts with everyday are men in their 30's-40's who have young families. A LOT of what they talk about revolves around family life- what their wives and kids are up to.

One man would tell stories of how he would come home from work, go into their bathroom and find vomit on the floor. "Who threw up in here!?!" he would shout. His wife had no idea that one of their children had vomited. Other days one of his children would call 911 while his wife was in the shower or there was the time when she came into the kitchen to find the baby had crawled up on to the counter to get into the cookie jar.

Another man would complain that his wife would come home with armfuls of shopping bags from the mall.

These men do NOT have full confidence in their wives. The first wonders what she does all day with the children. Does she actually pay attention to them? The second wonders if his wife can be trusted with the credit card. Is she capable of spending our money wisely?

My question for you today is: Does your husband have full confidence in you?

- Full confidence in your love and admonition for the LORD

- Full confidence in your faithfulness to your husband

- Full confidence in your ability to make wise shopping decisions (not just spontaneous ones)

- Full confidence in your ability to care for your children

- Full confidence in your ability to care for your home

- Full confidence in your ability to drive your family around safely (I'm not kidding here...)


Are you lacking in any of the above areas? What can you do about it? First, I hope you pray that God would give you what you need to be fully trustworthy in these areas. Secondly, I hope you find someone who can help you. Do you need to take a Christian course on budgeting? Do you need someone to show you how to properly clean your home? Do you need to put the cell phone away while you drive?

When your husband is fully confident in you, he will lack nothing of value. The men that Ross works with spend time worrying about what their wives were doing. If your husband has full confidence in you, he doesn't need to worry. Instead, he can rejoice in the gift that you are to his life. He can thank God that he has a wife who only has eyes, ears, hands, etc... for him. He can rest in peace knowing that you love and care for his children well. He can be eager to come home knowing that you have taken special care of his and your possessions.

Does your husband have full confidence in you? If not, ask him ways in which you can grow towards that confidence. Be humble and ready to change. If so, rejoice in both the love and trust of your dear husband.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

More than Rubies

Proverbs 31:10

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character
10 [a] A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.

A few weeks ago, we looked at Proverbs 12:4 which says that a wife of noble character is her "husband's crown." And here she is again : )

I think it is so fitting that this verse begins the passage. It won't be long before we see how hard this woman works- but right now, we are just going to focus on her noble character.

What does a wife of noble character look like?

- She's kind. She does thoughtful things for her family.
- She's humble. She doesn't think that she is "above" any one or any chore that may need to be done.
- She's patient. With the husband who hasn't fixed the sink yet and the children that are constantly making messes.
- She's honest. She shares her whole heart with her husband and doesn't mislead her children.
- She's gracious. She doesn't hold grudges, but remembers that everyone in her home is a sinner.
- She's hopeful. She knows that God is at work in her and in her family. She is excited for what He is doing.

Her character directs her towards her good deeds.

- A kind wife makes favorite desserts and writes love notes in lunchboxes.
- A humble wife changes diapers and cleans toilets.
- A patient wife picks up mess after mess, day after day, with a smile on her face.
- An honest wife tells the truth about her children's ages, even if it means spending more money at amusement parks, movie theaters and restaurants.
- A gracious wife pays a forgotten bill quietly, without chastising her husband.
- A hopeful wife can laugh at a toddler covered in spaghetti, and know that this stage won't last forever.

We have to admit that it's easier to learn how to do the good deeds than how to have good character. How can we develop these traits?

- Spend time with our God who has perfect character. Read the Word! Pray and ask for love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self- control. Record ways in which He has been faithful to give you these traits.

-Spend time with women who have good character. Proverbs is full of encouragements to surround yourself with people you want to be like and to avoid those who will bring you down. Find women (older, younger, same stage) who have noble character and read and pray together.

I hope you are encouraged that the first step towards being a good homemaker is having noble character. The LORD is always looking at our heart first. There may be days when the house is a mess, but we have had sweet communion with Him. There will be other days when we've cooked a dinner for 12 and snapped at our children just as many times. And still others when our kindness and patience have been well demonstrated through our actions. He knows our hearts and He is working towards making them more like His.

Today, I encourage you to take a look at your character and determine to cultivate it to be more noble. Hey, who doesn't want to be worth far more than rubies??


Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Teach Your Girls

Before we begin walking through Proverbs 31, it's important to look at why the book of Proverbs was written. Verses 1:1-1:7 tell us:

The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel:

2 for attaining wisdom and discipline;
for understanding words of insight;
3 for acquiring a disciplined and prudent life,
doing what is right and just and fair;
4 for giving prudence to the simple,
knowledge and discretion to the young—
5 let the wise listen and add to their learning,
and let the discerning get guidance—
6 for understanding proverbs and parables,
the sayings and riddles of the wise.

7 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge,
but fools[a] despise wisdom and discipline.

And verse 1:8 tells us who, specifically, all this wisdom and knowledge was for:

8 Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction
and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.

All of Proverbs, including our passage in chapter 31, was written from Solomon to his son, so that we would know the proper way to live. Solomon knew that it was important for his son to choose a wife of noble character, so he took special care to tell him what such a wife would look like. So that when he found her, he would know : )

Now, my question for you is: Have you taught your son what a noble wife looks like? Have you taught your daughter to be a noble wife?

Oftentimes, we push off things like this, because our children are "too young" to worry about such things. But, the truth is, it won't be long before they are old enough and on their own. We need to take care to teach our children how to be noble, kind, and humble spouses NOW.

If you have a daughter, or a niece or a cousin or a little girl neighbor, take care to teach her how to work well at home. If she's a teenager, perhaps invite her to walk through Proverbs 31 with us. Her husband will be very glad you did.

What's Up with Homemaking?

What does it mean to be a homemaker?

I think, due to my upbringing (my stay-at-home mom, stay-at-home mother-in-law, stay-at-home grandmas...) I have no problem encouraging women to joyfully embrace doing work at home. Other ladies, however, who have had to work, became concerned and a little bit defensive with that idea.

This gets me thinking. And when that happens, I can't stop thinking. What does it mean to be a homemaker anyway? Does it specifically mean you can't work, ever? Shouldn't Christian women enjoy working at home? Is that an anti-feminist statement? Do I care if that's an anti-feminist statement?

And then I got to the BIG question. What does God think about homemaking? What does He want me to do?

There have been several times in the past when I have searched God's Word vigorously for the answer to that question. What does God want me to do? Funny thing is, God's Word isn't as specific as we'd like it to be. It doesn't have the name of what college you are supposed to attend, what guy you are supposed to marry, how many kids you should have, or whether you should home school.

His Word is super specific about our hearts, though- that we should be humble before Him and others, that we should love Him with all our hearts, souls, minds and strength, that we should love others and put them before ourselves. Other than that, there is SO MUCH freedom in Christ!

The Word does give us some guidelines about wives and mothers working at home. And those guidelines are found in Proverbs 31:10-31.

Over the next several days (weeks, months??) we are going to go through this passage, verse-by-verse, looking at what a Homemaker's Heart looks like. I'll also throw some practical tips and links in there as well.

I hope you'll join me. I will do my best to make it more fun than running the vacuum cleaner : )

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Facebook Accountability

While our family was in Greer, TBC's high school youth students were at summer camp. I don't know all the amazing things that God did there, but I do know that our students came back with a hunger and thirst for God's word. Praise Him!!

One of the female students set up a Facebook group so that the girls can hold each other accountable. They have decided to begin by reading through the book of James together. Then they post insights and questions that they have.

It is such a neat idea and so simple. I am loving hearing how God is speaking to them through His word.

Now my question for you: Do you have a few friends who would be willing to read through the Bible with you on Facebook? I don't think this cyber interaction will ever replace face-to-face; heart-to-heart conversations about the word, but it is a good way to stay daily accountable for your quiet time.

I encourage you to ask a couple friends if they'd like to read and discuss with you. : )

James 1:1-5

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

James 1

1 James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ,

To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations:

Greetings.

Trials and Temptations
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.