Affirming our Husbands- a Glorious Task!

I've started reading an awesome book entitled Love that Lasts "When Marriage Meets Grace" by Gary and Betsy Ricucci. (This is the couple that is speaking at the marriage retreat that is coming up!)

Chapter 3 is written specifically for wives and talks about our role. It is FULL of sound theology applied to the marriage relationship. There is so much truth in it to reflect on!

Here's one that I've been pondering ever since I read it:

"All the godly qualities in your husband find their ultimate source in God and his grace. To recognize and affirm these things is really to be alert to God's activity and to give God praise. To fail in this is to rob God of the glory genuinely due Him."

Wow! I know I should be affirming my husband. I know that it would be an encouragement to his heart and that it is a kind thing to do. But sometimes, his imperfections seem to scream at me, and I have a really hard time not focusing on them.

But the truth is: God is at work in my husband. Ross is being transformed day-by-day into Christlikeness. Often the progress is slow, almost invisible. Yet God is at work.

And if I don't see it- if I don't acknowledge it-if I don't affirm it- if I don't thank God for it: I am robbing the Creator of the universe the glory due Him!

Wow! Suddenly, affirming my husband doesn't just seem like something I ought to do- but rather something I want to do. I really want to glorify God in everything. I really want to see the ways that God is working. I really want to see the good and godly over the bad and sinful.

I'm working on affirming Ross more. Even if it's the same things each day- God's grace is faithful and I will acknowledge the faithful work He has done in my husband. We need to be affirming our husbands (and really, everybody- God is at work in ALL of his children!) privately in our homes and publicly amongst our families and churches.

We can even affirm our husbands on the Internet. Here I go!

Ross has been demonstrating stronger spiritual leadership in our home lately. He has always prayed before we eat dinner-but now we have written down specific requests for things in the church and people in our lives. He is being a great example of an intercessor. I am thankful for our dinner prayers each night.

So... how is God revealing His grace through your husband today?

Blessed!

About a month ago, Ross, Caleb and I went to a friend's wedding reception. They had gotten married on the beach in California and were celebrating with family and friends at their parents' home. It was a very fun, joyous occasion- one in which we saw a lot of lovely faces from our past.

One of the dear ones that was there was a girl that I had grown up with and was the maid-of-honor in my wedding, Lindsay. We spent some time chatting and catching up. She also spent quite a lot of time loving on Baby Caleb- who she dearly calls her little nephew.

Lindsay had Caleb bouncing on one of her knees. He was so happy and so was she. I smiled at the way they interacted with each other- how she obviously loved him so and how he could feel that love. They both were grinning from ear to ear.

Then she looked at me and said, "You are so blessed! You have a beautiful baby boy. You have a wonderful, handsome husband. You are a beautiful girl. You are so blessed!"

Her words made me want to cry. She was so right. My life is so good. I have been given everything I need and so much more. I wanted to cry because I so easily forget that truth. It's so easy to think about the ways that that beautiful boy irritates me or that wonderful, handsome man has let me down.

Another part of me wanted to cry for Lindsay. She is a beautiful girl with a beautiful heart- but she doesn't have a husband and a child to love. I know these are desires of her heart- ones that God hasn't blessed her with (yet?? : ) ) In spite of that, however, she had a huge smile on her face- as if watching me be blessed was a blessing to her.

Thanks, God, for Lindsay. Thanks that you have given her eyes to see things that I had become blinded to. Thanks for her words. May I be ever reminded of the ways you have blessed me and may I, like Lindsay, remind others of your blessings when they forget them. And, God, please bless Lindsay abundantly as well- and let me rejoice in watching her be blessed.

All I Do is Dishes...

I stood at the kitchen sink this morning, staring down the pile. I let out a huge sigh and began the drudgerous work. The saucepan that I used last night to warm soup. The brownie pan that was still half-full of brownies- that just had to get out of my house. The half-dozen bottles that Caleb drank yesterday. The half-dozen cereal bowls that came from, well- I'm not sure exactly how 2 people can use so many bowls.... And all the other odds and ends that land in the kitchen sink.

Halfway through the chore, I thought to myself, "Is this what my life has become? Did I go to a university for 4 years, graduate with honors to do dishes? Didn't I just do all of this yesterday? And the day before that... And the day before that? Won't I do this again tomorrow?" Those thoughts are enough to make an otherwise sensible person go insane.

I took a deep breath, stared down the dishes, and thought about the little hands that hold the bottles and the sweet man who uses all those bowls. Perhaps I am the least of these.

Jesus would do the dishes. He washed the disciples feet. He would wash all the utensils, too. Doing the dishes (or the laundry, or the diaper changes or the yardwork or the whatever...) is not a menial task. It is not unimportant. It is not unseen.

Our Father in heaven looks down upon us and smiles for our faithfulness and our selflessness. It's what His Son would do.

Now go, and do the dishes, and rejoice. For the Father who loves you and the dear mess-makers He has given to you.

Sharing Jesus

When I hold Baby Caleb in my arms, when he gives me the biggest smile, when I watch him peacefully sleeping, I feel a deep urge in my heart to be with him forever.

I so desperately want Caleb to know the Lord and to love Him well. I want him to seek God's will first in His life. I want Caleb to be in heaven with us.

I know that salvation is not inherited-that someday Caleb is going to have to make that decision to follow Christ on his own. I also know that it's super important that Ross and I cultivate a household that honors and talks about the gospel often.

Caleb is only 6 months old- but he's heard the salvation story often. You may think I'm a little crazy, but I want discussions about the Bible and God to be commonplace in our house. So whenever I sin (which I am discovering happens an awful lot...) I tell Caleb why I do. Here's what that looks like:

The other day, Caleb was cranky. He was tired and illogical. He was screaming at me, pulling my hair, scratching my face. I was getting majorly frustrated- very fast. In a moment of weakness, I sinned, and in a very loud voice told him to "Just go to sleep!" (The fact that my voice was loud didn't necessarily make it a sin- but I can tell you that the anger I felt in my heart was definitely sinful...)

I immediately felt regret and told Caleb I was sorry. I then told him that Mommy wishes she never sinned, but that isn't possible. I told him how God made the world and He made it good. He made us and we were good. But we chose to not obey God and let sin into the world. And sin is what makes things that were meant to be glorious and beautiful, not so glorious and beautiful anymore. I told him that everybody who has every lived sins, except Jesus. Then I tell him that Jesus was God's son- all God and all man- and that he lived a perfect life. Jesus died and took our sins upon Himself. If we believe in Him we can go to Heaven and live with Jesus forever. Meanwhile, here on earth, we still sin but God is at work in us to make us more and more like Jesus.

Now, Caleb was crying through most of this gospel presentation, but it's still important that I share it. He needs to hear these words- these life-giving words. He needs to know the story and just how beautiful it is. So I've committed to sharing it with him whenever I can.

Now the question, for myself, is: How come I don't feel that sort of conviction with every person I meet? Every one of us is fallen and headed for Hell. How come I don't give that presentation to people in the grocery store, at the bank, at the mall? How come I don't talk about it with people that are close to me- aunts and uncles, friends? How come I don't even remind fellow believers about the beauty of the gospel?

Here's the truth and it's ugly: I don't love people the way that I should. I love Caleb and my love for him is deeper than it is for almost everyone. My pure desire to share Jesus with Caleb comes from a deep mother's love for him.

So a new prayer for mine is that I'd share the gospel much more openly. That God would give me a heart like Him, that loves each and every person as a dear, sweet child.

Will you pray that prayer with me? And will you seek to share the gospel with people. Start with your family- your kids and your spouse. And then let the Lord lead you from there.

Finding the Time

One of my favorite excuses for not doing something valuable, but something that requires discipline, is "Well... I just can't find the time." I have been known to use this for everything from consistent Bible reading, to exercise, to staying connected with people, to vacuuming, to blogging. : )

All of us listen to this lie at some point in our lives. And that is exactly what it is. A lie.

While we may be busy and have LOTS of things going on in our lives, they're not all equally important. I'd like to challenge you to take a look at the things you do throughout the day and find ways that you can fit in something of eternal value- specifically Bible reading or focused prayer.

Here are some classic time-wasters:

- Facebook

- Television/Movies

- Time spent feeling sorry for yourself, or jealous of others, or disappointed about your circumstances.

The first two are not inherently evil. However, I have to constantly check myself. I've decided I don't want to open Facebook before I open the Word. FB is fun and a connecting tool, but it will not feed my soul. It will not last for eternity. For a while, I had a posty note on my laptop that simply said, "NO FACEBOOK until you've read the Word."

(Honest confession: Some days that meant no Facebook and no Bible reading. Our sinful hearts can be so wayward at times....)

The last one, obviously, is inherently evil, but how much time do we waste- utterly waste- thinking things that aren't true? Our hearts should be rejoicing in the Lord and the grace of the gospel- not discouraged by all the thing we want but don't have. If you have time to whine, gripe, complain and mope, you have time to pray : )

So I encourage you to reflect on how you spend your time. It wasn't long ago (like a month or two) that I was convinced that I didn't have time to read my Bible and exercise every day. I did have a baby, you know! Now I can say that I read the Word every day and use the elliptical for 20 minutes 6 days a week.

Next stop- a consistent, peaceful, focused prayer time. I have time for it... I just have to find it : )

Gettin' Fit

I'm not quite sure what has come over me, but in the past couple of months, I've really wanted to kick my bad habits and nurture good ones. Perhaps it's the understanding that there is a little one in my midst who watches my every move and will, one day, be replicating lots of what I do. It's what spurred on the desire to be in the Word everyday, and to be praying without ceasing. It's also what has encouraged me to get serious about getting fit.

I've wanted to lose some weight for a long time now, but kept coming up with excuses. Some lame. Some legitimate. One of my more legitimate (I think...) excuses was that I knew that getting fit meant some serious dedication. If I was going to get serious about something, shouldn't it be something of more eternal value? I mean, come on, this body, fit or not, is staying here. Shouldn't I spend my time exercising and equipping my soul?

I think this is a legitimate concern. If you only have 15 minutes of free time in a day (we ALWAYS have more than that, we just don't like to admit it...) don't you think it is better to spend it in the Word than at the gym?

I also thought losing weight would mean spending a lot of time thinking about ME- my weight, my exercise, what I was eating, etc. That didn't seem very holy to me.

But if you remember the two verses that are the heart of this blog- you will see that losing weight can be done with a pure heart for Jesus.

Remember when we talked about Colossians 3:17? Exercising on the elliptical, eating a balanced diet, counting calories- all of it can be done for His glory if we are mindful of Christ and thankful to God.

Then there's our Titus 2 passage. One of the virtues in self-control. That's what led up to this commitment to getting serious about getting fit. Yes, losing weight would mean thinking a lot about me, but it would also mean giving up some tough sins- using food to satisfy all sorts of desires (most of which can be satisfied in Him) and choosing to be extravagant instead of prudent.

It's only been a few days since I started this challenge, so I'm still finding joy in the hard work : ) I know that self-control and discipline is not easy, but is how Christ is calling us to live. He certainly lived a life of control and discipline, didn't he?

So now, a challenge. Two actually. Would you consider praying for me as I seek to be self-controlled? Would you hold me accountable and ask me on a Sunday morning how things are going?

And.... if you, like me, could benefit from a bit of self-control in action, will you consider how you can get fit for Jesus? I'd love to share with you, specifically, what I am doing. Perhaps we can share a light lunch together : )

ALL Scripture!

If you recall, about a month ago, I decided to get serious about my Bible reading. I got an account with Bible Study Tools and started a chronological reading plan.

I am pleased to tell you that I have stuck with that commitment to read the Word everyday. It hasn't been perfect. I don't always feel like my heart is in the right spot or that I am gleaning everything that I can from each Scripture, but I am being faithful and the Word is being planted. And we know that God's Word always brings about fruit!

One of the trickier parts about a Bible reading plan is that they tell you what to read. (Huh? That doesn't sound tricky to me!) What I mean by that is you can't just read the warm, fuzzy passages of Scripture. I started in Genesis- which was wonderful- lots of good stories. I even discovered some things that I hadn't noticed before, even in stories I had read dozens of times.

But then, I went to Job. Some parts of Job are sooooo tedious! (I'd like to write a full post on that later....) Then I went to Exodus, which starts with a good story, and ends with a good story, but has blueprints in the middle of it. It's hard to apply tabernacle measurements to your life...

Last night at youth group, I spent time talking with high schoolers about their Bible reading experiences. We talked about how it seems hard to make time for it, hard to understand, hard to have a hunger and thirst for the Word.

With all this hard stuff, I keep coming back to 2 truths:

1) 2 Timothy 3:16 & 17 "ALL Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work."

2) Isaiah 55: 10 & 11 "As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it

without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. "

So honestly, I don't know why some things are in the Bible and how we are supposed to apply them to our lives (I'm going to get the commentaries out, though...)

But I do know that it is to our benefit to read His Word and it brings Him great glory when we treasure it. ALL of it : )